Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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