dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
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