can we get nightvision for the apartment?
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Randomize
