I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
