So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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