Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
