I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize