i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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