there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
