Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.