hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.