So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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