Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
