i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
