Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
