she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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