ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Randomize
