Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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