Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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