Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I just want to make out with him forever
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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