tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
