When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
