My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
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