Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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