last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Randomize
