come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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