If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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