respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.