oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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