remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
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she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
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they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
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