38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I deserve this hangover.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
