btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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