why didn't you poke me back
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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