I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
