Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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