My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
there is puke in my bra ... again
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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