I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
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