who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Randomize
