Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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