Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
