I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
