And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
