I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
