I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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