I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
