no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
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No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
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I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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