Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
