We got so high we made milksteak
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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