May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
