The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize